I am making some goals. Some resolutions. I am going to be BETTER!
Of course, I decided this all last night, a Sunday, when I was all spiritually enlightened from a great day. I always feel like being "better" after a great Sunday. And then Monday rolls around....
But the fact that I am writing this Monday morning means I am still thinking about being good! Its a good thing.
So here they are. I wrote them down at about 1:00 last night.
1. Read scriptures at least 20 min everyday (preferably before 11:00 p.m.)
2. Exercise everyday (if possible)
3. Clean my room (today) and keep it clean. This is includes a massive organization project.
4. Do SERVICE! I am going to be more aware of the people around me and their needs. Whether they are my closest friends and family, or random members of the branch or coworkers, I will be there to make their day better :)
Those are the main ones. I really hope that I don't fail, because I hate that.
But here's the thing. I've been trying to think of a way of doing what Elder Holland asked us to do before we left Jerusalem. He told us that we can't ever forget what we learned, we can't ever go back! So I was struggling to keep my memories and feelings fresh and not feel the pain of missing a chunk of my heart. Also, I just gave a talk in church, which gave me a chance to talk about Jerusalem, but I won't have that many more opportunities to give talks. So now I am going to use my love for the Savior to serve and help others. To be His hands. I think it is the perfect way to keep the Jerusalem spirit with me. And as I serve others, I will forget my own Jerusalem woes and feel as happy as I did during those 4 amazing months. :) I am so excited!
So. It feels so strange to report that nothing exciting has been going on in my life...what a change.
The post-Jerusalem depression has been getting easier. Most days are perfectly fine, especially if I'm busy hanging out with my friends (which usually consists of sitting at Jamie's talking....maybe playing catchphrase or Mario Cart), and I have work three nights a week to distract me.
Preservation Kitchen is actually treating me pretty well. Its almost fun! I'm getting the hang of the whole hostess and server's assistant thing. And its kind of fun because I get to dress up and look cute, but then I get really jealous of everyone around me having a night out and eating delicious food. Oh well.
Sometime last week I opted to go to bed instead of going to Jamie's after work. So in bed I started looking on facebook...at pictures of Jerusalem friends etc. And guess what? It HIT me. I had this huge ache in my chest like there was a chunk of my heart that was missing. And all I wanted was to be back at the Jerusalem Center with my three incredible roommates, or be back on the bus next to Abby driving somewhere amazing, or be wandering the streets of my favorite city with no care in the world. But...I had to tell my aching heart that it was over. Depressing right?
I realized that this is why I always want to hang out with my friends at night. To distract me from awful experiences such as that.
But other than random hear-wrenching experiences like those, I'm doing great. :)
I need to get another job to supplement the three nights a week that I have. But I'm having fun going to the weekly events. Church on Sunday, FHE Monday, work Tuesday, Ultimate Frisbee Wednesday, work Thursday, partying Friday, and work Saturday and party after work!
See? Life after Jerusalem isn't too bad, right? ...maybe? :)